and leave behind the trail imploring us all not to fail

hello all. and happy new year. happy new year one month late. sometimes you just don't have the energy for these things!

truth, i don't really even have the energy now, but its february, and i'm skipping my psych class because i had a anxiety attack last night and didn't sleep at all and then i couldn't dress myself and now i am sitting here in an oversized sweater thinking about disco music and feeling quite loserly. let's try some songs. let's just try a few songs, shall we?
















that last one is really for the song, but fred astaire dancing doesn't hurt either.


anyways, those are those. i'm working on my valentine's party which is in like 8 days. mostly music stuff though i need to start focusing on food and decorations really soon. plus my outfit. i already know what is happening with my hair and WATCH OUT. its going to be so good.

i maybe have more to say now but i am just going to post this and hope i find the motivation to post again soon. with pictures! with power! with potential!

xx,
bb

tingling right from my head to my toes

living a long time looking on and on

here's a smattering of songs that are pleasing me lately:





















and here i go slipping through this week, surely assisted by nibbles of xanax and sheer luck, slipping right into a free freezing winter water wonderland.

and went looking for another light

i've paused undressed (which (you're welcome) you may view here: http://www.undressedtv.com/) to make good on my promise and show you some blue sky blues to cure your grey sky woes.













i love wearing a big scarf as much as the next girl but right about now i miss being BROWN. sitting in that car singing taylor swift sunshining on my forearms and that one patch of thigh the big open world just breezy all around and every single thing is the best possible song. it'll be back soon enough, is what i tell myself to bear the boots and socks and slacks and such. and until then life will just continue to stack on itself in the most clever ways. sometimes it'll catch me, jostle me, out of daydreams; tug me by the elbow and say "but just look at whats happened here" and what can you do except make that cute surprised face and laugh at the waywardness of it all.

and that's quite literally all i've got.
i've moved on to huck finn (whatta rascal) and i'm about ready to read that in my perfection of a bed. i'll see you see you see you soon.

echoes of light that shine like stars after they're gone

listening to things of this nature (and so much katy perry, sorry sorry sorry) recently and holding onto everything good left inside of me with the same hands i use for treasures at the thrift store and knocking on all the wood. truth is, i know only the best things are coming, but somehow superstition still sits on the top of all truths in my life.




working on a pile of pictures from 2009-early 2010 and you will be seeing that stuff real soon. two weeks left of fall semester and i can't wait to sit in a bathtub for my entire winter break. imagine the love i'm sending you is like a quarter i've just pulled from your ear. xx.

these rivers of suggestion are driving me away

weekend upstate with naomi and the sunny days and crisp nights. friday i sat on a rock in the yard with basically bare legs and let the cold seep through layer and layer and layer until i could actually feel it in my bones. looking at the stars with frozen bones and then leaping around the yard until i felt brand new again. thrifting and estate sales and my old haunt crossgates mall yielded plenty of treasures. today was country driving, historic houses, picnic food picking, picnic food eating while overlooking albany county. sweet albany county, you hold my history and my heart. i miss this place more and more and feel so foolish for the feeling. life is good life is grand and life will gift good things. like i said last night "i can't wait for all the good things that are going to happen to us" and to you too...

honey, keep the oven warm

here's what i have to say about the week that kicked my ass:

i have never been so tired in my whole life! STUPID tired. catching 20 minute naps here and there. eating scraps of food between napping studying cleaning teeth attending class. jumble week. i walk down the streets mumbling the names of odontogenic cysts. sit on the bus lost in some histologically stained daydream. eliza assay, western blot test, trisomy 21, cri du chat, herpangina, hairy leukoplakia. ugh. and above everything else, hovering, I AM SO TIRED.


so that's that. i'm using some lovely techniques to make my life more like my life. and i'm taking me and my techniques and a whole boat full of laundry oh and that friend naomi hanson to my house in the woods this weekend for some post-fall pre-winter relaxation activation. i lost my digital camera (!) last week so i can't prove anything happens. i guess you'll just have to take my word for it.

and now to get to that sleep...


(you know i am capable of much more than this, don't you? i'm sorry i'm sorry infinity i'm sorry to me you and everyone we know for my brain dead brain. pma willing me back to life)